October 2, 2006

  • Breathe

    This is the air I
    breathe
    This is the air I
    breathe
    Your holy presence
    living in me

     
    This is my daily bread
    This is my daily bread
    Your very word spoken
    to me


    And I’m desperate for
    You
    And I’m lost without
    You

     

    Why is it that although this song was written eleven years
    ago, and was widely popular about four or five years ago--and taking into
    account that I’ve sang it in worship services off and on during that time—that
    it is really only meaning something to me now?
    I’ve sang it countless times and thought to myself, “How many of these people
    (including myself) are really desperate for God?” And there is a fine line
    there between second guessing your congregation and trying to keep it real—and
    that’s why I kept singing it, not because I felt like it was true necessarily
    for me at that time or for everybody, but because I felt like it was probably
    true for some.

    So, there are about a hundred more layers we could peel off
    of that whole last thing, but that’s not why I’m writing this—I just think NOW
    is the time when I’m really resounding with those lyrics. I found myself
    listening to that song on Thursday or Friday and sitting at my desk thinking
    (or trying to think…) “I really am desperate right now for God to reveal
    Himself to me”. I think the load I’m carrying right now is a lot, and I really
    need to rely on Christ to carry me through, and help me make right decisions
    about future and stuff…I’ve been getting less sleep and physically I feel OK,
    but I think I have more trouble focusing and remembering stuff when my brain
    hasn’t had good rest…yikes.

    Anyway-don’t go of worrying about me (Mom & Dad), I’m
    just trying to stay afloat and not neglect my family. Last night I just laid
    down for a few minutes to relax because I couldn’t keep working, I just wasn’t
    motivated at all…but after a little break and a Caramel Frappuccino (yes, I’m
    back on sweets) I was back in action.

    Anyways, lots to do. Moving soon…

Comments (6)

  • You're back on sweets? Awesome. Let's go to the 'bucks later.

    I am much more grateful to have lived a life in desperate need for God than one without him, and I'm sure you are too.

  • ^^^I've always been dependent upon God, just not DESPERATE for Him. There is such an emotional part to the word desperate that I've never felt or tapped into. It's hard to describe, but desperation is certainly nice, because it mostly frees me of concern for all kinds of stuff...it's just in God's hands...

  • While we're talking about the song, let's mention how our dear new pastor reverently got down on his knees during that song and sang it passionately to the Lord. Seriously. I am blessed by that.

  • That would have been moving to see your Pastor!  I love that song Daniel.  I was just thinking the other day, how do unsaved people make it without God?  How do they go through their trials and tribulations?  Thanks you Lord for finding me!!

  • ^^^I know man, I don't know how they do it. It's SO hard!

  • I'm feeling pretty desperate for God right now.  I think it's there much of the time, but am I really doing anything about it?  You know what I mean?

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